Friday, January 27, 2006

I think it's sinking in....

I got a phone call about an hour ago from Hannah's friend's mom (Nancy). We have a Friday playdate with our kids and rotate houses. Today, I had to leave to go to a Hail and Farewell (military-related folks will know what this is), and Nancy graciously offered to keep Hannah over, feed her lunch, and bring her to preschool, since all the girls go in the afternoon.

Well, when Nancy called, she was upset. It seems that the 3 girls went into 7 year-old Jacob's room and TRASHED it...not just messed it up, but tore down posters, ruined pokemon collector stickers, emptied drawers...just made deliberate mischief. I was quite upset, as this is NOT how Hannah generally behaves.

She was gone with Scott to get a video when Nancy called, so I had time to stew about it. I was angry, boy howdy! This is NOT how I taught my daughter, and I was ready to rip into her. But...conviction...and patience followed.

They got home and I sat Hannah down. The three of us talked about the phone call. I asked Hannah if she had done this, and she said yes immediately...she didn't lie to us or try to make excuses. She did mention that it was not her idea and she didn't want to go, but one of the other girls suggested it. I believe her in that; she is generally not a ring leader.

We talked about why it was wrong. We explained that she will have to apologize to Nancy AND Jacob, and discussed what her punishment should be. She had picked out a movie for this evening, and we told her she could decide her own punishment - she said she wouldn't watch the movie. We also said that she will have to take some money out of her piggy bank to pay Jacob for the damaged poster/stickers, and she agreed.

This is BIG. First off, she told the truth! She accepted our talk, without crying, whining, excuses, etc. And she set her own punishment, which we felt was pretty reasonable. She absolutely LOVES money in her bank, and giving it up is a tough thing for her to do...even when we just empty it to put in the "real" bank! So her agreement to "restitution" was pretty amazing.

And through it all, I remained patient, quiet, and boy, am I humbled by this experience. It just goes to show that if I listen to God and follow his lead, everyone will be happy (well, happier, any way!).

1 comment:

SB said...

that is AWESOME. You must be VERY proud of your girl....