Monday, December 08, 2008

Monday Meme

I've been lax about updating my blog. I know, I'm moving and that's a good excuse, but still, there are things I liked to do weekly on my blog and haven't been. There's a lot more going here than I have shared, and it's been a painful lesson in who you can trust and befriend. Sadly, people I felt were good friends turned on me, and it just plain hurts to the core. I've tried to let it go, and it hasn't worked well. I've prayed to God to take this burden, to let me "grow up" about it all, but in the end, I feel betrayed, and I think the only thing that will truly cure it is leaving here. It makes me sad, because there is so much I love about this place; I don't want to associate it with the rotten things that happened in the last few weeks of my time here.

BUT....here's my Monday Meme (even though Monday's almost over)

Outside my Window...
dark, cloudy, with a Winter Weather Advisory in effect.
I am thinking...Just a little longer...hold me up just a little longer Lord.
I am thankful for...the true friends I have made here, who don't become petty and rotten and let themselves get bullied by people they don't even know.
From the kitchen
...it was a really good steak, rice and corn.
I am wearing...sage colored top and pants in a soft "French Terry" fabric...which I paid $1.75 for BRAND new!
I am creating...a good legacy here, for the most part...those who knew me well here will know that I did what God intended for me to do here.
I am going...to Scott's Change of Command tomorrow, no matter that it will be held outside in the snow and rain and cold....no matter that the very people I was betrayed by will be there...because it is HIS day, and I won't fail him.
I am reading...The Shack - it's a FANTASTIC book, but I have to read it in bits and pieces because there is a LOT to digest in there.
I am hoping...for weather to be so bad they move the Change of Command indoors...with one person about to deliver a baby, another with pneumonia, and children in attendance (not mine, I have common sense and leave mine in school, lol!), indoors would be MUCH better.
I am hearing...click of the keyboard, hum of the fan, TV upstairs
Around the house...laundry is mostly done, kitchen's somewhat clean, scrap/stamp area is completely packed
One of my favorite things...Christmas decorations - it makes me sad that I can't decorate this year.
A Few Plans For The Rest Of The Week: bible study tomorrow a.m., Change of Command in the afternoon, possible massage on Wednesday, last OCSC luncheon on Thursday

15 comments:

d.a.r. said...

Speaking of bad friends, I have been awful! I am so sorry, I am so caught up in school and stuff...basically, caught up in myself. Bad habit.

I hope you are doing okay with all of the moving stress, take care and please let me know if you need anything! I won't be at the Dec. luncheon (I have a final), so I don't know if I will see you again before you go! Take care!!!! Enjoy the change of command :)

Bessie said...

It is sad that people often loose sight of the big picture.

I wish your family well in you next appointment. I really enjoyed your pictures, especially the Crossing and the Konza.

Suzanne said...

I'm sending you a virtual hug from Hawaii! I wish I could send some of this sunshine too. Reading about the upcoming change of command helps me not take for granted the nice weather, even though I really miss "real" seasons.

I'm sorry there are some hard things going on. I know what you mean about not wanting to associate your memories of a wonderful place with those kinds of thing. Thank goodness for prayer and the power of the Lord.

Good luck with your move!

Jessica said...

I have been wondering where you have disappeared to! Missed ya! OH OH Linda, I can honestly with all of my heart truly understand the pain you are feeling. I have been suffering depression for just at a year now over "so called Friends" that broke my heart. OH MY! I take things too hard sometimes (wouldn't you say so?) I hope that you will just remind yourself that there is NOTHING wrong with you and YOU DID NOT DO ANYTHING to deserve this. The thing is that there are just awful people on this earth that like to take advantage and use good people who have good intentions. OH! I wish I could hug you! I would probably cry with you like a blubbering idiot cause I know how you feel. I have literally lied awake in bed many sleepless nights just trying to make sense of it all! But the truth is that God will bless you for being a good person to others and I know it is difficult to ignore the pain. I just told my mom that grieving the rejection was sort of like the grieving of a death to me. I take relationships so personal because I put my entire self into friendships. Well, I know that was a complete emotional dump on you but just know IT IS NOT YOU! THERE IS NOTHING WRONG WITH YOU! GOD WILL BLESS YOU FOR BEING A GOOD FRIEND TO OTHERS! Hugs and lots of love!
Email me if you want! You have my address.
Jessica

Lori said...

The Lord shall preserve you from all evil; He shall preserve your soul. The Lord shall preserve your going out and your coming in from this time forth, and even forevermore. Psalm 121:7-8

Thought you might need this right now! In my own words, "Don't let the jerks get you down, keep your thoughts on what matters most, your faith and your family." End of sermon.
There is a hug, a plate of cookies and a cup of something warm waiting for you at your friends' house in PA! The boys can't wait to see Hannah and Scotty.
Good luck with the COC and please tell Scott we are thinking about him.

Sue said...

Sweetie, I know things just got tougher and believe me if there was something I could do to help I would!! I understand your frustration right now I feel for you, I really do......nothing I can say will make it better. I love you and call again if you need to talk, yell, cry and whatnot -- I WILL listen

Bob-kat said...

So sorry to hear about your so-called friends. It is easy to say forget about them as they obviously weren't real friends but I know how difficult the feeling of betrayal is to lose. Something similar happened to me and I still feel betrayed over a year later, though the feeling is more in the background and I have been able to forgive the people involved, though not forget. I hope you are able to put these feelings behind you soon with the distance.

Good luck with the move!

Cynthia said...

I can SO relate to your post. I'm not moving, but I've also recently been hurt by some close friends. And, I'm trying to just move on, but as you say it is hard.

SB said...

Lord, please look after Linda and her family as they travel this Season. Let her know that she is NOT alone. And that she is loved. Hers is a worth above rubies. She has been a great witness to many. I hold her in the highest regard. So please offer her comfort.

In His name,
Suzanne

De'Etta @ Choosing Joy said...

{{Linda}} I'm so sorry your last weeks in KS are filled with pain. I've been praying for the details of your move a lot this week - and will begin to pray about relationships....and your heart.

saintseester said...

I am so sorry to hear you are in emotional pain when this time of year should promote only good. I hope things get better as you focus on your move. Good luck!

Heidi said...

Thinking of you... praying for your situation and the move to become peaceful and go as smoothly as possible.

Take Care, Linda and Merry Christmas!!!

Christy said...

Oh Linda I am praying for you, for your heartache, and for this move and ALL that it entails (from Ceremonies to packing, to driving). I'm going to keep praying you through this and just being intentional in saying your name daily until things are settled.

Love you

The Mrs. said...

so sorry to hear that "friends" have let you down. Its a painful sort of hurt. I hope your able to take something away from it and move on with an open heart!: ) Good luck getting things together and enjoy your new place!

rennratt said...

Today's the day!

Praying for safety for you and yours!

Call if you need anything. I mean it.