Friday, February 13, 2009

Stupidity at its finest! this article - beginning to end...then read what *I* have to say about this. I got this from April, a woman I recently met here - she had it on her facebook.

First have GOT TO BE KIDDING ME!!!!

This has to be a joke. Must absolutely BE A JOKE. Because honestly? There can not be someone out there who is this stupid. CAN NOT.

I want to address this point by point:

What DO stay at home moms (referred to as SAHM in this message from now on) do all day? And don't give the grocery/laundry/library/cleaners thing because I do that too?

Why yes, you DO all those things...for YOU alone. You don't have to do the laundry for yourself, your husband and the kids you have. I don't want to HEAR "well, you made the choice to have X kids" it 1 or 15 kids, I had kids because I was led to have them. And whether I have 1 or 15, I have to take care of them. And that means laundry...lots of it. 2 kids can generate a LOT of laundry, especially if they are in the potty-training stage, or are sick...or just being kids who like to play and color and get dirty. That means that I can't just toss it into the washing machine...I have to turn everything the right way, look for stains, treat them and get them in the wash. My husband works all day. He doesn't need to come home and do laundry. This is my end of our "bargain". I do this because I don't want my family looking slovenly. They have a right to nice clean clothing. No one else will do it for them.

And yeah, you have to do groceries, but you're not shopping for kids. There are meal plans to make - we don't go eating out several times a week just because I don't feel like making a meal. I have to think nutrition. I have to get the best foods that will grow my kids into smart, intelligent, healthy adults. I can't feed them chickent nuggets and fries every day. You go shopping, drop a couple hundred dollars on necessary (think no name brand and bargain stuff) and see if your heart doesn't stop when you see that bill...and do that twice a month. I don't do dry cleaning...I do laundry. Unless it's an expensive suit for my hubby, it all goes in the wash, or gets a good hand wash. Then again, I don't have time for luxuries like fancy clothing that needs cleaning. I'd rather spend that money on food for my family.

Library? Well, when YOU go, you get to browse the stacks...perhaps sit in a chair and read a chapter...pick up that newest Cosmo magazine on the rack and read it quietly. SAHM's? We have kids tugging at our legs to get to the kids section. They need to go to the bathroom. They want to look at and touch everything. And it's the library, so I want them to be quiet (in order not to disturb or offend YOU). I want them to be interested in books, to have a great love of the library and all it can offer. So I take them. They go to story time. We pick out books, we learn how to treat them. We join in the reading contests to win prizes.

Why don't SAHM's have time for email and phone calls? I work 9 hours a day (and some after work events) and still find the time to do it all.

SAHM's take the time to email and phone the people that matter. You need to get a clue, lady. Your "friend" isn't calling or emailing because YOU don't understand. We're emailing and calling other SAHM's who are in the know. The ones who can answer the question, "what gets poop stains out of carpets"...the ones who will sympathize with us when we say we were up all night with the sick child...or had an "inkling" and stayed up "just in case" (and the inklings? They're almost always right on the money - moms, in general, KNOW this). We're busy with life as it happens. You're making phone calls during work time - getting paid to slack off. You're sending emails on the company dime. Did you know most businesses have email monitoring and keystroke monitoring? They're watching your every move. You just might be out of a job sooner than you think.

And your "after work events"? Call them what you want; you're going out after work. For us SAHM's, there's no "after work". We don't get time off. IF we're blessed with understanding husbands, we get to go out with friends once in a great while (but don't worry, we won't be calling the likes of YOU). We don't go hanging out in bars drinking margaritas till the wee hours of the night. Because too much imbibing means that our families will suffer. The only one who suffers if you tie one on is YOU.

I"m feeling like the kid is an excuse to relax and enjoy. Is this a contest (my life is harder than yours)?

EXCUSE TO RELAX AND ENJOY? You must be off your rocker, woman. We DON'T relax and enjoy. Playdates and playgroups and playgrounds? SAHM's are NOT the ones playing! We may seem like we're just sitting enjoying the sun, but seriously? We're watching our kids. Making sure the boy doesn't decide that eating a shovelful of sand is a good idea. Or making sure he doesn't feed it to that little girl sitting there. We're refereeing the fights (he took my bucket; I wanted to swing there; he looked at me funny; she pushed me off the slide, etc, etc). We're being diplomats (honey, he didn't know it was your bucket, look, he's giving it back; Hey Mary, I know Tommy wants to swing, but can Jimmy go first?; sweetheart, you just look away if you think he's looking at you, etc, etc). We are exchanging horror stories (Last year, Timmy fell off that same slide, I think it was the same kid who pushed him down!), we're exchanging recipes (let me tell you, that simple crockpot roast is THE best), but most of all, we're networking. The same thing YOU do at your "after work events"'re trying to move up in the company, we're trying to survive one more day.

It most certainly isn't a contest. By all means, I'll bow down to your "much harder life" life, while busy, hectic, and harder than anything else you would consider, is worth SO MUCH MORE. You couldn't pay me enough to live the life you lead. And seriously, if all your child-free friends wonder the same, then all of you need a serious enema. You're all full of it.


Barb said...

Very well said!! I can't imagine anyone with an ounce of sense would think the life of a SAHM is one of leisure.

Barbara said...

I have a friend who is unmarried and childless and, without being snotty about it, asked me just what I do during the day. Her job is equally hard (she's a nurse on a staging ward, which is one step down from the ICU) but she said my job sounds much more fun. And it really is! So Amen to the woman who responded to that letter. Give that woman a Pulitzer!

Lori said...

My first thought was that if this self-absorbed, self-important woman wanted to really find out what her friend does, she might step into her friend's shoes and offer to babysit for a few hours. Nothing informs better than immersion in a situation. However, this woman doesn't really want an answer, she wants her own ego massaged; her self-doubts justified. She is seriously starting to realize that her own biological clock is ticking louder than the company time clock. She is jealous of the choices her friend has made and this is her way of expressing it.

Kim said...

I am laughing out loud! You GO GIRL! I am amazed at the audacity of some people. One day, she'll get a clue.

Ali said...

You are the voice of the SAHM! My favorite was the playground referee part and that you said she needs an enema! You make my heart feel lighter!

rennratt said...

You know, many of my best friends are SAHMs. One of them is Nooze's 'second mom'. She homeschools her 2 kids (who are brilliant, btw); she leads the kid's choir at church; she runs the preschool ministry at church; her kids are active in local sports and take music lessons.

She also keeps house (quite well, considering she's almost never home), bakes, cooks, etc.

Oh, and did I forget to mention? Her husband is serving his second tour in Iraq.

I have often told her that she needs to wear a cape. I am totally in awe of her.

Christy said...

I read this last week and yeah she can stuff it! LOL No seriously she's either the most self centered woman or so completely clueless.